A Mistake & A Wish...

I wish when u walk on a road

U stops there for just a minute to remember what u has left behind

Because sometimes without u knowing u has left a lot,

And left people who care and love u

And maybe they still there waiting for u to see them or realize their existence…

I made once a mistake like that I didn’t see what I have and I kept running afraid of getting hurt until one day I realized what was there wasn’t here anymore it disappear and left me alone…

At this time I realize my fear had made me hurt myself and I regret it until today, and every day I remember what I have done and I can never forgive myself I was blind didn’t see or know what was there beside me until I lost it…

I wish if I could go back and has only a chance to fix it and ask a question…

Only one question… would have ended my suffering…

Did they left me because they forget about me and stopped caring Or was it because they got hurt and they want to forget…

Sometimes it’s difficult to understand what others has been through… u wish u do but all u can do at this moment is just be there for them…

Urs: AmyBadr

8:45 PM

23-11-2011

From Korean Drama "Will It Snow At Christmas"

Sadder Than Love (That what i call it, i love the words so much)

The one i think of when it rains, that person.
The one who never spoke too many words, that person.
The one who hid his sufferings of love, who cried not able to forget the departed one, that person.
One day he asked me inside a car, what is the saddest thing in the world?
I hear that sadder than love... is affection.
The one who shook his head that time, that person.
In a lonely sick room, he played me his guitar, consoling me, that tenderhearted person i loved.
Without a single word goodbye, I wonder is he somewhere happy now?
Perhaps, will he think of me at once in a while.
The one i still miss, that person.
The one i need to forget now, that person.

Taylor Swift - White Horse

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale.....
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around
Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
I had so many dreams about you and me
Happy endings, now I know
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale...

Blind

U know
That we are blind
We only see what we want to see
We only see what’s outside
And never see what’s inside
We always think that truth is only what’s in front of us
While it’s maybe hiding inside of us
But we became so blind to realize that
We only see what we want to see
We only see what’s in front of us
No one know the truth
And that because we are so blind
That because it’s inside
We never give any one time to let us know the truth, the real truth
Or let them show us who they really are
We only see what we want to see
We only see from outside
And after that we judge
And we never give anyone a chance,
To let us know who they really are
We only see what we want to see
And that’s why we became so blind
We never give anyone chance to let us see who they really are...
Urs: AmyBadr 

01/08/09         04:18:19 AM

Back Street Boys - Shattered

So empty, can't feel no more,
As I'm left with my tears on the floor
I wait for my heart to mend,
But you keep tearing a hole

Inside, I'm so lost,
In the middle of my heart
It's a battlefield of love,
I've been fighting far too long

And now I'm shattered,
(From you chipping my heart, kept taking it till it broke)
Oh how it hurts
Felt it slip from your hand, hit the ground and now it's shattered)
I'm so shattered
(Can't believe you left me, I'm so shattered)
So shattered
I'm shattered, cut from with-inside, oh

What am I still here for,
Could it be that I'm just waiting
Hoping you'd rescue me,
And put the pieces together again

Tell me what you're really here for,
If you never really loved me
I gave my all but it still wasn't enough

'Cause all you had to say was that you ain't
Looking for commitment
Instead of telling me what I wanted to hear, oh-ho

You took my emotions
And scattered them on the ground
So hard to just pick up,
And move on with life, again

Oh yes, I can't believe, you left me, so shattered

A Wish...

A Wish... Something I wish I had...
A Wish... I wish I was in pain that never end... And that I have...
A wish is like a dream come true...
What if u has no dream?
A wish I wish u were there for me... But u aren't...
A wish suppose to be true...
What if I don't know the truth?
A wish... I wish I can have a wish,
Something is mine,
Something is good...
A wish for me mean... That even if I have to be in pain
To help others
This is a wish for me...
I love helping people,
And feeling pain for them,
I love to cry for them and make them laugh...
A wish is something true...
Is that mean that it has to be something I can do?
Can't I wish to be an angel...?
I always wanted to be an angel
Can’t I be good enough?
I feel happy when I am in pain or sick
Do u know why....?!
Because that will erase all the bad things that I have done
Am sorry am like that
But that what I feels
A wish is something for u and me
Maybe we can have it
And maybe it's just in our dreams
A wish is something coming from your heart
I wish if I had what it takes
And do my best to be an angel
A wish is something we can't always have
And it's only one........
Take your time and think what u truly wishes
And wish it from your heart it will become true
I’m a wish and I will give u all a wish :D
Because I have u all
And u are a wish for me to come true
U are the best friends ever
And am always lucky with my friends
Because they are good like an angel...............
And have kind and good heart…….
That's a wish that became true...
But I wish i didn't wish so hard...
That I keep Losing my wish every time I try hard....
Urs: AmyBadr

19-6-2009       11:07 PM

I’m not perfect

I’m not perfect
Don’t look to me in this way
I’m a human like u all
I have mistakes
Am no perfect
Don’t put a lot of hope in me
Because at last u will end up hurting your self
Don’t think am good
Maybe that what appear to u and sometimes I believe that am good too
But that’s not true
And this person inside me don’t care about anything...
I Wish it was different but it's not...
Urs: AmyBadr

06/02/2009 02:27:43 AM

From Korean Drama "Paradise Ranch":

One year is like a day, like time’s memory ♫
One year is like a day, like time’s memory ♫
I don’t see it as love ♫
I don’t see it as love, that's why it hurts even more. ♫
Even if it returns as regret, it remains in my heart. ♫
I loved you with the same heart. ♫
My heart speaks, what about my heart? ♫
One step, two steps, should’ve walked slowly. ♫
Under the name of love, come to me .♫
Inside my heart you leaned on me, you were laughing ♫
Stay in my heart ♫
As much as it hurts me ♫
my strangled tears too ♫
Now I’ll leave you in my heart forever ♫
Whenever in my heart, there will be one person . ♫

I Keep on Going Anyway...

I keep on going anyway knowing that it will hurt... 

I keep on crying everyday knowing my tears won't change a thing... 

I keep on going to the same road knowing how it will end... 

I keep regretting my mistakes knowing i will do the same mistake all over again... 

I keep feeling pain inside watching people in pain but i act all strong about it like i don't care... 

Am so scared... 

Am really scared wish u were here beside me holding my hand... 

Like they show in drama always there's someone beside the person who suffers, then why am all alone and there's no one there to talk to. All i have is my notebook that i can write in it and cry too...

Can u see how my heart feels they tell me if i close my eyes and shut my ears i can see and hear what i want what if i don't know what i really want will i live like this forever a lonely life which i will feel always empty in it... empty that it became a burden in my heart that it hurts so much.... 

But I keep on Going Anyway......#AmyBadr 

(at 10-4-2012     3:34 AM)

From KoreanDrama "A Man Called God"

The world is an ocean of energy. Energy is the driving force of all activity. Control that energy with the mind. Heaven and hell, success and failure, are all made by the mind. With your mind, feel the presence of something. What you see is not the only truth. Breathe in rhythm with your enemy. When your breathing becomes harmonious with the enemy's, you can now know the enemy's next move.

I Wish If the Night Was Longer

I Wish If the Night Was Longer

I was just sitting there in my cold room

Holding my hot cup feeling its warmness

Listening to my music

About love and scarify and pain

All I could think of that it hurt so much hearing people stories

And what have they achieve and done in their life while am still the same

Standing in the same place with the same feeling

Always crying but there’s no change

Seasons change people come and go

And am becoming old but still standing there

Not even walking one step forward

I just stand there don’t do anything and that kill me inside so slowly

My tears keep in falling

I want change I want do something

But why I feel like I can’t

And here when my mind stops

And I feel like I want scream but no one hears me

And that’s when I finish my cup and it become cold

And everything become still

And everyone is sleeping but am still here

And that’s when I decided to come here…. To write about my story………

In my cold room all alone I open my window stay there looking around

While the air is touching my skin and I can feel it so cold

And I say maybe it will freeze the time and everything

Maybe like they say when my feet is cold I can’t feel the pain in my heart

I want it all go away and that’s when I realize it’s time for bed but I don’t want sleep

When it’s time to walk up I don’t want to it’s always like that

This dream seem so real and that feeling too

I can’t seem to do anything about it oh my god it’s not a dream

It’s real………..

And that’s when I stand there and freeze…………..

Urs: AmyBadr

4:46 AM         28-11-2011

Waiting...

Do u know that am still waiting for u... 

One day will come and it will all come true... 

We will never be able to lie about it or hide our love, 

it will remain in our heart and maybe pain will come to join after that,

and that's when we will realize that we have lost so much by hiding how we felt and acted like it was nothing... 

But i will keep walking along the road waiting for u to come and join me when u know what u truly feel and what u truly want.... #AmyBadr

19-3-2012                                       12:23 AM

Crazy

Am so angry and sad

I don’t want be like this, But am mad

I want do things differently, But I can’t

And if I do it I make it more bad……

It’s not easy like it looks,

Because inside my heart is burning and turning to dust,

And that make me so sad and broken…

Can’t act cool or okay,

All I can do is just stay numb in silence and try to smile…

Tears I cry it when am alone and nobody can hear me

It used to make me better but now the more I cry

It feels like I want cry more…

Angry from myself I get up and act like I don’t know what’s wrong…

I feel empty and this emptiness is killing me

Nobody can see me or feel me and am okay with that

But I hate when they push me so hard toward something I don’t like

And that make me want go crazy and shout

I try to hold myself back and smile like a crazy person don’t know why…
Urs: AmyBadr

10-7-2011                                                            3:25 PM

When I'm With U...

I don't want face this world alone
Your the only one that make it feel like home
When I'm with u
I feel like i can do anything i want
I feel safe
I feel like i can fly anywhere
When I'm with u
It's all doesn't matter....
All that matter that we are here together
So take my hand don't leave it
So we never lose each other....
Urs: AmyBadr

Saturday, 7 June 2008 at 21:42

Never gone be...

Never gone be
Never gone be in love again…
You’re my world
Yes you remain here in my heart
You remain the life I want, the life I live,
The air I breathe…
Never gone be
Never gone be in love again…
You took my breath away
You let me live a dream and think it’s real
Yes you remain here in my heart
Never gone be
Never gone be in love again…
You and me
Here it comes to an end
Never gone be
Never gone be in love again…
Urs: AmyBadr

18-4-2011                 8:42 PM