I can’t… I can’t run any more… I will have to face the fact that even how far I run I will return, even how far I go my mind and my heart stays… I have to admit it that I can’t go far away no matter how hard I try… I try to hold on but it hurts so much…. I hate how people plays with words when u look at their eyes and know there’s no sincerity in them it hurts… the truth hurt but lies hurt more… I wanted to believe in everything, I wanted to be pure but u broke me and I can’t feel anything… that I have changed gradually I have become a person who I don’t know, who feel numb all the time, who cries and feel pain and angry, who is lonely always even if there’s people around… u can feel anything that your heart don’t want to feel I can tell u things that’s real… the truth hurt but lies hurt more… there were time that I wanted to give up but I kept going on and when I was tired I just stood there numb staring at emptiness that when I felt my life lost all its meaning… that’s when I felt empty inside, that’s when I knew that I hated myself, I hate myself so much that I want keep on hurting, that sometimes I feel that I like to feel pain and cry that sometimes I thought of hurting myself… I don’t know how to stop… I don’t know what I should do but I keep revolving around myself that sometimes I want just give up I want fall and not get up I want stay there where no one can find me or see me in a place where I can break free… where I end my suffering… I don’t know how I don’t know what am saying I must have gone crazy… so let’s end it with the place where u want to go to the most where u feel comfort and forget all the pain and began new… I wish if there were such a place… but it’s just a dream that your heart wishes for so desperately… Wishing one day u wake up and find it became real… I’m afraid to dream because I don’t have the courage to hope or think or try to make it real I have given up on dreaming…
Yours: AmyBadr
(30-2-2012 5:28 AM)
(30-2-2012 5:28 AM)
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