Dear Diary;
I know it’s not
about the past
It’s about the
future and that’s all am afraid about
Walking along a
road looking around
Thinking about it
all makes me so scared
Feeling I have
nothing
Or feeling so
alone
Feeling that
always keeps me down
Make me sad and
want cry
This feeling can
never change
Always trying to
think positive while I feel negative
Always trying to
talk about something else other than pain and sad time
But it seems no
matter how hard I try to forget or run
It seem that I
keep returning back to where I was
And all I could
remember is bad and sad time
And little about
good memories and that even make me sadder
Remembering them
but can’t have them
Remembering them
and knowing that I have lost them
Wanting them back
in my life but can’t have them
No matter how hard
I try…
When I laugh
because am trying to hide behind my smile
It’s not because
am happy,
And when am really
happy tears come out of my eyes
Feeling like am
afraid because this memory won’t last
Always so afraid
so scared but thankful for this happy time
So thankful that
my tears won’t stop
Trying to be there
for people whom I love
But always my pain
and sadness take me away from them
And am sorry for
that
Hope I can change
to better
But I can’t
See what am trying
to say
I want something
make me try harder
Something that
make me stronger
I think times will
reveal it
Because I want believe
it…..
I wish my believes
is true because I don’t want fall
I want stand up
I want be strong
for u…
Yours: AmyBadr
3:21 PM
20-5-2011
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